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Jonathan Cinelli's

People First Approach

When Passion Becomes Pressure: Supporting Kids Through Mental Health

  • Writer: Venessa Russo
    Venessa Russo
  • Jul 18
  • 3 min read

Discover how to support your child when they want to quit what they love. Learn the signs of emotional struggle and how to parent with presence.

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What do you do when your child wants to quit the one thing they’ve always loved?


Not because they’re lazy.Not because they’re bored.But because they’re not okay.

In a recent episode of the People First Podcast, I sat down with Nancy — a fellow parent navigating something many of us don’t talk enough about: the emotional toll high-performance culture can have on our kids.


Her daughter, a hockey player through and through, came to her and said she wanted to stop. And not because she didn’t love the game anymore… but because she was emotionally and mentally exhausted.

That conversation was a turning point — not just for Nancy, but for me too.


Kids Are Struggling — And They Don’t Always Have the Words


One of the biggest takeaways from our conversation was this: children often carry their struggles silently. They don't always say, "I'm overwhelmed" or "I feel anxious." They say things like:

  • "I don’t want to go today."

  • "This isn’t fun anymore."

  • "I just want a break."

As parents, it’s easy to mistake those signs for laziness or lack of commitment. But sometimes, those words are quiet cries for help.

And when we ignore them? We risk pushing our kids further away — not just from the sport or activity they love, but from us.


Are We Really Listening, or Just Leading?


I’ve been guilty of it myself. Believing that “pushing through” is a sign of strength. That resilience is built by showing no weakness.

But what if true resilience starts with giving our kids the space to say, “I’m not okay,” and being met with compassion instead of correction?

Nancy reminded me that being present isn’t about showing up to every game — it’s about showing up emotionally. It’s about being available when they need someone to listen, not fix.


Pressure vs. Passion: Finding the Line


There’s a fine line between passion and pressure.And it’s our job as parents to help our kids walk it safely.


That doesn’t mean we remove all challenges or discomfort — those are important teachers too. But it does mean that we stay curious instead of critical. That we create space for hard conversations without fear of disappointing us.

Because when a child feels like they can’t talk to us about their struggles, they internalize that pain. And over time, that can become more damaging than any bad game, tough practice, or missed shot.


What You Can Do as a Parent Today


Here are a few things we touched on that might help you, too:

  • Look for signs of burnout. Mood changes, withdrawal, or uncharacteristic behavior might be a red flag.

  • Ask open questions. Not “Why don’t you want to go?” but “What’s making it hard right now?”

  • Validate their feelings. You don’t need to agree to listen.

  • Separate your identity from their success. Our kids aren’t here to fulfill our dreams.

  • Make mental health part of the regular conversation. It shouldn’t be a last resort.


We’re Not Just Raising Athletes — We’re Raising Humans

This episode isn’t just for sports parents. It’s for anyone raising kids in today’s world — a world where performance is praised, but emotional health is often overlooked.


It’s time to flip the script.


To stop measuring our children’s worth by their trophies or stats.


To start asking how they feel, not just how they did


To lead with empathy, not ego.

Because at the end of the day, no game, no goal, no grade is worth losing the connection we have with our kids.


🎧 Listen to the full episode of the People First Podcast with Nancy [insert link]🗨️ Drop your thoughts in the comments — let’s open this conversation.


 
 
 

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